No thick skin
No thick skin
We do not need thick skin or worse, indifference. It is the opposite of what humans need.
Especially the collaborating artists such as musicians.
Our art thrives by unhindered flow of energy, without fear of any consequences.
What we absolutely need however, is a higher perspective of the sometimes suppressing circumstances we find ourselves in, and to work around those elegantly.
Without pointing fingers, without blaming others or ourselves, and with our skin constantly getting thinner on our journey.
In any kind of business or human interaction you will run into situations that leave you with an unclear feeling.
The uncomfortable kind, that asks “is the way I am being treated justified? If so, do I suck? If so, why am I not getting fired?”
I find this especially troubling when it happens in art, in music, on the turf I chose to wander on for two decades now.
Because the cuts are close to the heart. Because it is not just business, it is what you are.
And I think it might be worth considering the following findings for anybody involved in music, or actually, anybody involved in human interactions on any level.
There are undoubtedly musical geniusses around us, who are well worth listening to and what they have to say when you are in their band. And not because they are musically “superior”.
Most of these great spirits will tutor and guide you naturally, lead you by example with compassion and subtlety. They seem to know that every interaction is a two way street, and that we all are always learning, if on different levels. You will know when you meet one, and you can feel blessed to be around them.
Now, there are of course also the cats whose art might be on a similarly high level, but they are less well tempered souls themselves.
Their self-centeredness unfortunately has the power to take your soul for a spin, in a bad way, if you are not prepared.
Of course you want to keep the gig, stay close, share the light they seem to be in. And of course you will be questioning your resiliance, your endurance, question your ability to make it in the music world. Because as good as the music might be, you will still suffer in rehearsal and backstage.
And here is my point. Do not grow thick skin. Do not get numb.
There is no need to blame anybody on either side. Thus there is no need to blame yourself and feel bad.
If ANYONE on our planet cracks down hard on you, THEY chose the wrong sideman.
Or they choose their side men for the wrong reasons, i.e. having a desire to rule rather than to get the best from everybody.
Your feeling is right, no need to justify it. Pain is unavoidable, suffering is optional.
So go with your heart, always. Either shelter it with the knowledge that you are here to learn, like all of us.
But you are not wrong!
Keep the gig and grow.
Or turn on your heel, and look for greatness in people whose energy is more uplifting to yours.